The Last Weekend

So its our last weekend... I can't believe that Molly and I are both moving, and that we won't be roommates anymore. Crazy... We started our weekend off with a bang Friday night, took a little road trip to Richmond and saw Ingram Hill play again. It was awesome to see them actually plugged in- they were great acoustic, mind you, but this was even better. It was a fairly decent sized club, but the crowd was really small. It was, however, a great crowd- everyone knew all the words, and sang along. I think it made the guys feel a little better about the size of the crowd.

Interestingly, the bassist's girlfriend was in the crowd this time. Cute enough, [and believe it or not, she has actually read my Blog, and so, for my good deed of the week, this part has been removed...]

Last night we went out to Mo and O'Malley's to see our friends Kevin and Randy play, which was fun. Usually those nights are pretty mellow- they play more of the Dave Matthews/John Mayer/Jack Johnson type stuff, so its nice and quiet for the most part, and we had a great time.

Today, Easter Sunday, were gonna do brunch and then come home and get ready for the movers to come this week....

Rock Star Nights

I have often used the phrase "Party like a rock star" to describe an unusually hard party weekend, but this past weekend I can finally say that I partied with the rock stars :) Well, maybe not really rock stars, but they will be! I went and saw the band Ingram Hill the other night on the Spirit of Norfolk (dinner cruise, they have them all over the place) with Molly, my friend Jen, and her friend Tony, and somehow I managed to get the band, the opening band, the road crew, and half the radio crew to come out to Mo and O'Malley's with us afterwards. And it only gets better... not only did we get them to come to our bar, but we ended up going back and partying with them further once the bars closed... one of those weekends where the pictures are there, and in a few years when they get past playing small clubs and college campuses I can look back and say I partied with them in Norfolk once!

It only got better from there. The next morning (well, OK, early afternoon) when we finally made it to brunch at the local Irish watering hole, we walked in to find a large table of loud, drunk Irishmen. We had our meals, then moved over to the bar to visit with Steve the bartender (who had just made us some outstanding Bloody Marys) and ended up sitting with these Irishmen as they continued to get drunker... and it was only about 5:00.

All in all, combined with the interesting events of Friday night that I won't even get into, it was a weekend to remember. Too bad there are only a few pictures!

Moving On update #1

Well, its been a little over a week since I decided I was done with Stupid Marine, and so far I think I'm doing alright. Two days after the aforereferenced incident, he did finally call, leaving a lengthy excuse on my voicemail that did not have an ounce of apology in it. My first reaction was what, it takes your phone two days to charge after the battery dies? Going Zack Morris style or something? But thanks to the help of Molly and our friend Terra, who listened to the voice mail with me when I put it on speakerphone, I have not spoken to him. I have not called him, and he has not called back.

I am proud of myself in many regards. He has been messing with me for years, and its time to move on and put him out of my life so he can stop hurting me. There's another part of me, though, and understandably I think, that is just hurting over it. The disappointment is so real- when he was in Iraq we talked about how he didn't write at all while I was on deployment, and I made it clear that it could all be fine and dandy while he was over there but the minute he got back I was stopping with the effort. Maybe he didn't believe me. I think that he really must have though yeah right, she's never done that before, why would she do it now. Well, guess what. I win. I did it, and I'm week one into life without Joe, and I'm doing just fine. For now. Im sure it will get harder, because at some point, somewhere down the line, he's going to call, or he's going to e-mail, either in mass or individual form. It is going to take every ounce of strength I have not to answer that call, or to hit delete on the email. But I think I can. In fact, I know I can.

Cooties? Maybe so....

Everyone knows that boys are stupid. We learn it at quite an early age, that boys are stupider and have cooties and we should not go near them, blah blah blah. Then we get to an age where we decide that was totally wrong and boys are the greatest thing in the world, and that lasts for a few years, usually ones ending in teen. Eventually, at some point, however, we realize that, in fact, boys really are stupid. They never call when they're supposed to. They tell you they will call you and tell you where to meet for dinner, then when you finally call them they ask if you have eaten yet, and oh, maybe they should get a bigger table. Then, they say they'll meet you at the bar, so when you leave, you say "see you in a few minutes," like they really are going to meet you at the bar. Then, of course, they don't show up, and, on top of that, don't bother to call and make up an excuse for not coming out. And then, the next day, nothing.

Well, for those of you that haven't guessed that this is what happened to me last night, you must be boys. Yes, boys and girls, the infamous Joe has struck again. However, this time I am taking a stand. I am no longer putting up with this crap. I know I've said it before, but this time.... well, I'll let you take the attitude on this that I've taken towards him: believe when you see it.

And wish me luck, because it is going to be a potentially difficult and painful ride.

Family Matters

I dont think most people realize how much our old relatives really love company. I spent just over 24 hours this week in Rochester, Minnesota visiting my great-grandparents, who are 95 years old and live at a retirement home attached to and owned by the Mayo Clinic. They were so excited to see me, and so glad that I came to visit them. Even though it was quite possibly the most boring 2 days of my life, it was also I think the most meaningful and appreciated in a very long time. They are obviously too old to travel anymore, and therefore the only way they see anyone is if other people travel to see them. Their daughter and her kids all live in the Minneapolis-St Paul area, but all of my Mom's brothers and sisters live all over the place, so they rarely see our side of the family. I felt like by going to see them I had really done something important, and I felt the best about myself that I had felt in ages. Its quite a nice feeling.

A little reminder...

A new bill is being worked through the Virginia lawmaking process to alter the wording of the state Constitution. This new wording would be added to the religious freedom section and would basically reemphasize the fact that Virginians have the right to free exercise of religion, that the government cannot force any religion or sect, or establish a religion, but adds the caveat that the people's right to express their religion, beliefs, or traditions as they choose on public property, to include public schools, shall also not be infringed upon.

I have been involved in more discussions on this topic than I can count, and I am almost relieved to see that someone in a position to have an impact is somewhat in agreement with me. Don't get me wrong- I am all for religious freedom and separation of church and state. I just finished reading a book about the Inquisition in England during the rule of Bloody Mary, and I can't imagine living in an environment like that. However, I am also truly of the belief that the Founding Fathers are turning in their graves over the way we have interpreted that idea in the last few decades. Whether people want to admit it or not, the basis of this country and all of our governing documents was faith. The reason people came here to begin with was to escape religious persecution. How can we say we are a religiously free nation when children get in trouble for participating in religious clubs or the morning flagpole prayer meetings, or are told they cannot wear their religious garb to school because it might offend those who are not part of their religion? Or when we let a person who has no faith win a lawsuit because he is offended by those who do?

I think that by allowing this reword into the Virginia Constitution, the state would be reminding people of the principles on which this country was founded. We are a melting pot. We are a mix of any and every culture and religion on earth, and we are proud of that. Why should we force people to suppress the very things about them that drove them or their ancestors to this country to begin with?

Good riddance!

Its finally over.

Two years and two weeks after reporting to the ship, I am finally gone. For those of you that knew me when I first reported, I was excited about it, and for the first, oh, 18 months or so, give or take, I was having a blast. I enjoyed the people I worked for, worked with, and who worked under me. But those same of you will also know that in the last six months, it has just gone downhill. I have not been happy; in fact I've been counting the days until I can leave since I got my orders in October. And now, that day has come, albeit a day early- I was actually supposed to leave tomorrow, but, in typical ship fashion, they screwed it up and I left today. Good riddance, I say! Its time to start fresh. New faces, new chances to excel as they always like to say. Wish me luck. But for now, time to enjoy a few days off!

The LSAT is over!

They always say you get dumber after college, and they also always say the Navy will dumb you down. Both are true, as I discovered yesterday morning when I took the LSAT. Not dumb like stupid, but dumb as in an inability to think in any logical or analytical manner. I had the worst headache by the end of that test... but well see, maybe I actually did OK. Ill let you know in 4-6 weeks!

Inbox (1 new), Junk Mail (6 new)

There needs to be a "do not call" list for email.

Maybe they could call it "do not Spam," or something. I don't know. All I know is I am so sick of getting emails with "Better than V^i^a^g^r^a" or "C*ial#is" or"Diet Pills as Seen on Sixty Minutes" as the subject lines. Believe me, if I wanted to be getting emails about Viagra or Cialis or herbal remedies or Diet pills or free gift cards or containing porn, I would ask for them. But please, please stop sending them to my inbox. Where do they get my email address anyways? I have a very obscure email address, and Ive had it for almost 8 years. I dont particularly like the email address, but everyone knows it, from all of my past lives since high school, and apparently the 8-10 junk emails I get a day are a really small number compared to the 30-40 that some of my friends are getting. I am just afraid that if I get a new account it will be ridiculous.

Maybe Ill write my congressman. If they can do it for telemarketers I bet they can do it for Spam.

Idolaholics Anonymous

Hi, my name is Rebecca, and I am addicted to American Idol.

Even when I know the show is going to suck (the auditions all do), I still must watch it. If I did not have DVR, I would probably work my schedule around making sure I could watch it. I didn't know about it until the very end of the first season, so I didn't care so much about it then. But then season two started, and we were all at SWOS, and it was our normal show, and I just couldn't stop. The hardest part about leaving on deployment was knowing that I was going to miss most of season three. I even watched that stupid "From Justin to Kelly" movie when it came on HBO. Maybe its just fascination- I have always been a singer, and the first time I remember doing a solo performance was in my elementary school talent show in 4th grade, and all the kids accused me of lipsyncing Debbie Gibson's No More Rhyme. Then I hear some of these kids that get on American Idol and I can't help but think that I could do that. But then Im always afraid I would be that girl that the judges just laugh at. But then again, maybe not.

I think its time to make a deal with myself. For next season, if there are auditions anywhere near me (like within driving distance) and Im not underway, Im going. Why not. Just like anything else, I don't want to spend the rest of my life wondering, what if I had tried out. And hey, they had that Marine who couldn't do pushups, why not a Naval Officer?

Sometimes, violence really IS the answer

I put up with a lot for my job. I spend most days dealing with slightly below-caliber personnel who do all kinds of stupid things. I know who needs a little extra supervision, and I can tell, usually fairly soon, who is going to be alright. What I can't deal with, however, is people above me who seem to have no understanding whatsoever of the fact that the people who work below them are not perfect. That sometimes things are going to slip up a little, that every once in a while they may get a product that is not what they expected. Not that that makes it OK of course, but its a reality thing... it happens. I know that all of the superiors were in the position once of being a subordinate to someone at their current level, in some way or another, but sometimes, it seems as though they have forgotten that part of their life. Ive seen a few that are great about remembering, and a few that perhaps are a little too good at it, but in the last year or so I have seen so many that have absolutely no idea. It manifests itself in so many ways, from the way a person talks to people, to the way they talk about people, to the expressions on their faces when people are around. I hope I never turn into one of those people who forgets what its like to be at the bottom. If I do, someone please kick me in the head and bring me to my senses.

Conspiracy Theory

Apparently, almost half of the black population in the US thinks that AIDS was developed in a lab and that there is a cure but it is being intentionally withheld from the poor. A survey, reported on in today's Washington Post, also says that 15% of blacks surveyed believe that AIDS was created as a method of genocide against them. 40% say that either the government or the CIA developed it. It made me feel a little better though that 75% believe medical and public health folks are working hard to try to stop its spread.

It is unbelievable to me that people in America still think this way. I was really surprised by this article, and the opinions expressed by a professor (yes, they actually let this guy teach) who says that African American lives are not valued because they are more likely to live near pollution and far from health care. At least there are some guys out there who are trying to change these views though. The Post interviewed the head of the Black AIDS Institute in LA who basically said that people need to wake up and realize that past discrimination is no excuse for these conspiracy theories. People are more likely, if they think this is all a conspiracy, to not be as safe in AIDS-prone situations, such as sex and drugs, because they figure why should they bother.

Kinda scary from where I sit....

My brother, the genius

My brother David is way smarter than me. Now instead of all those pesky long http addresses, I have finally figured out the whole link thing. Every time I tried to post a link before I just sat there flustered as I went through every menu on this stupid webpage, and I think it took him like 10 minutes looking at it to know and share it with his big sister.

I promise, Im not as retarded as I may seem on this computer....

Walk for a Cure

In communities throughout America, thousands of people participate in Arthritis Foundation events. I am one of those people. I am teaming up with the Arthritis Foundation for the Arthritis Walk, where I will be walking in honor my thirteen year old sister, Emily, who has arthritis. I am writing to ask you to lend a hand as I take on this personal challenge!

Please visit my Web page (link below) to make a secure, online contribution. Arthritis doesn't discriminate -- it affects one in three people, including children like Emily. People turn to the Arthritis Foundation for information, support and resources -- you and I can help. The Arthritis Foundation has made it easy!

Your generosity ensures that the Arthritis Foundation continues leading the way toward prevention, control and cure of the number one cause of disability. Contributions through special events are vital to providing these services. Anything you can give is appreciated, and, together, we can make a difference.Thank you for your support!

http://fairfaxarthritiswalk.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=80863&supId=69889061

PS- any of you that will be in the DC area on 21 May, sign up to join my sister Sophie's team and participate in the Walk at Robinson High School.

Another great lawsuit...

Some people just don't know when they have it good....


State Worker Sues for Having Nothing to Do
Friday, January 21, 2005
Fox News

ALBANY, N.Y. — Pat Freund has a job most people would envy. She spends her days at work reading the newspaper and finishing crossword puzzles, and earns about $100,000 a year for her troubles, including benefits.
But Freund isn't content to put up her feet and watch the paychecks roll in. Rather, she is suing her employer, the state of New York, for not giving her any real work to do.
"It could have been a lot easier for Pat had she continued to sit in her office and do nothing, and continue to basically be the most avid reader that the state has employed," says Sue Adler, the attorney representing Freund in her federal civil rights lawsuit. "But she decided that was not how she wanted to live out her years working for the state."
Freund, who has been a New York State Liquor Authority employee for 25 years, says it all started in 2000. She believes her superiors were angered after she questioned the practice of colleagues attending Gov. George Pataki's annual prayer breakfast. But instead of firing her, Freund says, her responsibilities were taken away.
Now Freund does nothing at work, on the taxpayers' dime.
Mike Causey of Federal News Radio has examined government employment issues for more than 20 years, and says the same protections that make it difficult to fire government workers sometimes backfire.
"People say that they're [employers] either trying to drive them out one way or the other, and one of the ways to do it is to give them nothing to do," Causey says.
When asked about the lawsuit, the Liquor Authority said it was policy not to comment on pending litigation. So until a trial, Freund will most likely continue to do nothing at work.

Aah, validation!

From today's Washington Post....

Daily Drink Helps Keep Brain Sharp, Data Suggest
By Rob Stein Washington Post Staff Writer

Women who imbibe a little wine, beer or even spirits every day are less likely than teetotalers to see their memories and other thinking powers fade as they age, according to the largest study to assess alcohol's impact on the brain.

The study of more than 12,000 elderly women found that those who consumed light to moderate amounts of alcohol daily had about a 20 percent lower risk of experiencing problems with their mental abilities later in life.

"Low levels of alcohol appear to have cognitive benefits," said Francine Grodstein of Brigham and Women's Hospital in Boston, senior author on the study, published in today's New England Journal of Medicine. "Women who consistently were drinking about one-half to one drink per day had both less cognitive impairment as well as less decline in their cognitive function compared to women who didn't drink at all," Grodstein said.

While the study involved only women, the findings probably hold true for men, although previous research indicates that men seem to benefit from drinking slightly more -- one to two drinks per day, researchers said.

The findings provide the latest evidence that indulging in alcohol, long vilified as part of an insalubrious lifestyle, can actually help people live longer, healthier lives. While heavy drinking clearly causes serious problems for many people, recent research has found that drinking in moderation protects the heart. A few small studies have similarly suggested that alcohol may help the brain. The new study is by far the largest and most detailed to examine that question.
"We know it is beneficial to have a drink a day for your heart. This says there is an additional reason to follow that guideline -- it can protect against cognitive decline," said Marilyn S. Albert of the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine, speaking on behalf of the Alzheimer's Association. "So now we have two reasons to do it."

Alcohol appears to protect the brain in the same way that it guards the heart: by improving blood flow. It may also reduce the risk of small "silent" strokes, which can cause subtle brain damage that erodes mental powers.

For the new study, researchers analyzed data on about 12,480 women ages 70 to 81 participating in the Nurses' Health Study, in which detailed information is being gathered about thousands of nurses as they age to try to assess how myriad lifestyle factors affect health.
Data on alcohol consumption had been gathered regularly beginning when the women were in their forties and fifties. They also underwent detailed questioning by telephone when they reached their seventies to assess their ability to remember and reason and to perform other mental functions.

Those who consumed half a drink to one drink each day for at least four years were about 20 percent less likely to have an impairment in their thinking abilities and about 15 percent less likely to experience a decline in their mental powers over the two years they were studied, regardless of what type of alcohol they preferred, the researchers found. On average, women who drank moderately tended to have the memory and reasoning agility of someone about a year and a half younger than those who abstained. No benefit was seen among women who drank more than that.

The results held true even after the researchers factored in characteristics about the women that could have confused the findings, such as age, education, how many friends and family members they had, how much exercise they got, and whether they had any other health problems.

While the findings are encouraging, several researchers said they were concerned about strongly recommending that people drink more based on the results, given the heavy toll from alcohol abuse.

"The prevention of cognitive decline in old age . . . is one of the major public health challenges of the 21st century. Few things are as valuable as the unimpaired ability to reason," Denis A. Evans of Rush University in Chicago wrote in an editorial accompanying the study. But "persons seeking to maximize cognition in old age must keep in mind . . . the knowledge that alcohol consumption can be a double-edged sword, with the dangers of over-indulgence being all too familiar."

Elderly people are at particular risk for experiencing problems from drinking, such as falls, which can be life-threatening, said Molly V. Wagster of the National Institute on Aging. But Wagster added that the weight of the evidence clearly indicates that moderate alcohol consumption cuts the risk for dementia.

"The preponderance of the observational evidence certainly points in that direction," Wagster said.

The findings suggest that moderate drinking should join the growing list of steps that people can take to try to stave off mental decline, such as getting regular physical exercise and routinely engaging in mentally stimulating activities, Albert said.

"The basic message is, there is a lot we can do to lower our risk for cognitive decline," she said. "I would add having a drink a day to that."

Dumb celebrities....

I was listening to the radio on the way home and the local country station had Billy Currington on because hes playing here tonight. I can't remember if Ive heard any of his songs before, but they played one and it was pretty good, and I was thinking maybe Ill go see him. Then he and the DJ started talking about this video/song he did with Shania Twain, and the DJ asks, "you recorded it in Switzerland right?" This guy, no joke, says, "No, not Switzerland, a town called Geneva. Its about an hour and a half from Switzerland."

Does it say "Babysitter" on my nametag?

When I joined the Navy, I had this image of people like my dad and my grandfathers and other family members who had been officers in the Navy. You know, adults. And I put emphasis on the word adult. Little did I know that I would be dealing with children who do things like this:

This kid bought him self one of those neat knives with three blades that fold into a kind of circular shape, kind of like a ninja star. OK, fine, you might say, so what? Well, this kid lives on board, and put it in his locker. OK, you say, I still dont see the problem. Its locked up. This is contraband on the ship, but thats not even the point. Kid forgets his keys to his locker yesterday and needs the lock cut. Alright, happens all the time, the duty master at arms takes him up and cuts the lock. Locking your locker is required though, and when the berthings are cleaned daily if the cleaners come across an unlocked locker they have been instructed to take everything out of it, bag it up, and put it in a designated room downstairs for safekeeping. You fill in the rest of the story.

Or how about this one. Kid is at a party and decides that the passed out drunk girl in the other room is the perfect person to have sex with. Obviously he didn't ask her permission, she was passed out...

One more for you. Kid is on leave for Christmas visiting his mother and terminally ill father, who, by the way, noone here knew was terminally ill. This kid had negative leave, but his chain of command had worked with him to get him home for Christmas, and even gave him an extra day when he was having trouble gettinr the money from the bank to get his car to come back. This kid decided that since he had no leave he probably wouldn't get to see his family again for a year or so, he should just go ahead and stay home an extra day. So he did. No calls, no nothing. Just didn't come back, and then lied about when he did.

I could go on forever. Each of these incidents has happened in the last 4 weeks. None of the above kids is older than 20, which is really not that much younger than me. But it sure does feel it. I guess because I had only dealt with officers before I had no idea. Goes back to the whole generation gap/lack of discipline thing. Half of the kids that come straight in the Navy have never been disciplined, have never been away from Mommy and Daddy, and with this kinder gentler Navy had a cake walk through boot camp.

My CO has this nametag for his SWO Sweater that has his name and rank just like normal and then under says "SURFACE WARRIOR." I think Im gonna get one that says "BABYSITTER."

Everything smells like Bourbon Street!

A little over a year ago when Melanie told me that she was getting married in New Orleans this January I told her I would go UA before I would miss it. You don't spend four years living with someone, at the Naval Academy no less, and then just not show up to their wedding. When she told me a couple weeks later that she had gotten married already but that they would still be having the party, I told her that I would still go UA before I would miss it. I mean, I would not have made it through those four years without her, a sentiment that made me cry each time I said it at the party- her family was telling me the same thing about her. I am so glad I did. One thing you have to understand about Melanie is that she comes from a very crazy and very large family- her parents are each on their third spouses. This party included almost all of them. Her Mom, ex-stepdad (and more of his family than any other), and current stepdad, and her dad and his current wife and their 3 year old son, as well as family members of all. And all of these people, all differences aside, were there for one reason- they all love Mel. It amazes some people, but because I know her so well and know how she is, it would amaze me if they didn't feel that way. She is not someone you forget easily, and is a very easy person to love. So I wish Mel and Shane the absolute best, because she deserves it more than anyone I know.

I opened up my suitcase last night when I got back, and suddenly my room was filled with this funk. Made me glad my roommate can't smell, because there are very few smells quite like that of Bourbon Street. I didnt really even spend that much time there, but it doesn't take much...

35 more days...

Right now Im at work and I have nothing to do. How, you might ask, is this any different than any other day? Well, its not really. Except that today it got a little twist. The day after a duty day is always long, especially when you are trying to leave and can't. But today was further enhanced by my friend Chad who, at 452 this morning on his way to the gym, decided that since he was awake I should be too. Umm, wrong answer. I usually get to sleep a little later on duty days since I dont have to drive in. It would have been OK, I could have gone right back to sleep after the little beep letting me know I had a text message, but waking up also made me realize that it was freezing on the barge. Luckily I had no further blankets/sweaters/warmth of any kind. And, finally, to make matters worse, anyone who has ever been on a Navy ship and drinks coffee knows that, especially inport, mess decks coffee leaves a little something to be desired. Youd think with the number of people on a ship who drink coffee we would have gotten the art of making it down, but it seems as though no matter what, its always the kid that doesnt drink coffee that gets assigned coffee making duties in the mornings. Id rather go without than drink some of that. Then, sitting here a little while ago complaining to Chad about the whole chain of events that he started, I had another thought- does that make me a coffee snob??