Random Writers Guest Post - A Hero

(Cross-posted at Random Writers)

When my friends Gil and Lee were soliciting guest bloggers for the Random Writers project, I looked at the list and immediately knew that I wanted to write about someone that's a hero to me, especially this week that contains both Veteran's Day and the Marine Corps birthday. Regular readers of my blog have seen me write about this person before, but I just can't do it enough.

I'm pretty sure I met Matt Freeman on July 1st, 1998. I say pretty sure because that was our Induction Day at the US Naval Academy, and I remember very little of that day. But Matt and I were both in India Company, 17th Platoon, and we all had to meet and learn some things about each other in those first couple of days. For the next four years, we all lived on the same floor, trained together, had ups and downs together, and saw each other at our best and at our worst. Through it all, Matt was always there for everyone. He never got involved in any of the personality conflicts or other drama.

After graduation, I went off to Surface Warfare Officer School as a Navy Ensign, and Matt went off to The Basic School as a Marine Corps 2nd Lieutenant.  We were MySpace friends, and later Facebook friends, and saw each other at our five year reunion, but never kept in super good touch.  However, that did not make the blow that I felt when I heard about his death in August 2009 any less severe.

Matt was stationed in Japan, and had volunteered to go over to Afghanistan on an Individual Augmentation to support a Marine unit that was short on people. Just before he left, he quietly married his high school sweetheart.  A week after his arrival, Matt called his mother, who was a lifelong teacher, to tell her about what he was seeing with the children in Afghanistan. He told her that the children wanted to learn, and wanted pens and paper and school supplies almost more than food and water.  He asked her to ask around at their church and collect some school supplies for the children.

Two days later, Matt was killed in action. Below is his Bronze Star Citation, because there's no way I could do this description justice:

The President of the United States takes pleasure in presenting the BRONZE STAR MEDAL posthumously to CAPTAIN MATTHEW C. FREEMAN, UNITED STATES MARINE CORPS for service as set forth in the following

CITATION:

For heroic service in connection with combat operations against the enemy as a Fire Support Team Leader and Company Advisor for the 1st Battalion, 3rd Brigade, 201st Corps, Afghan National Army. Captain Freeman’s keen judgment and decisive leadership were ever present in all phases of Operation ENDURING FREEDOM. On 7 August 2009, Captain Freeman engaged in the combined and joint Operation BREST THUNDER in one of the most dangerous areas within the 201st Corps’ Area of Operations, the Shpee Valley of Kapisa Province. The strength of the enemy in the Shpee Valley was estimated to consist of more than eighty insurgents with reports that a large number of reinforcements had recently moved into the area. Acting to conduct a reconnaissance of force in the valley, Captain Freeman’s element received enemy fire almost immediately upon leaving the combat outpost. Pinned down as the result of this fire, Captain Freeman decided to clear a kulat in order to gain access to the top deck and achieve better observation of the enemy’s firing position. Receiving a heavy volume of enemy fire, Captain Freeman led the way in clearing the house and was the first to reach the rooftop. Once on the rooftop, he spotted an enemy Rocket-Propelled Grenade gunman and immediately killed him. He and one of this team members spotted several other insurgents and began to engage while under fire. It was at this time that Captain Freeman fell mortally wounded. He fought with bravery and determination while demonstrating unwavering courage in the face of the enemy. Captain Freeman’s performance of duty in a combat zone reflected great credit upon himself and upheld the highest traditions of the Marine Corps and the United States Naval Service.

Matt's family and friends are doing everything possible to make sure that nobody forgets Matt and that his last wish is fulfilled. Matt's mother took his request for school supplies and ran with it, and established the Matthew Freeman Project: Pens and Paper for Peace in 2010.  The Freeman Project has sent over 12,000 pounds of school supplies to not only Afghanistan but also Iraq and other war-torn nations.

People want to list celebrities and sports stars and famous political figures as their heroes, and I guess that's OK, because everyone defines the word hero differently. On August 7th, 2009, we lost someone that I believe epitomized the definition of a true hero.  Please consider visiting the Freeman Project website, watch the videos, read about Matt, and if you can, make a donation.

Remembering a Hero

This weekend marks 2 years since the death of my friend, USNA classmate, and 12th/17th companymate Capt Matthew Freeman, USMC, while providing cover for fellow Marines on a rooftop in Afghanistan.  He'd just married his high school sweetheart a couple of weeks before leaving, and in fact only their families and closest friends knew that they'd gone ahead and gotten married prior to his departure.  He was only in Afghanistan for a little over a week when he was killed. (I've written a little about Matt here and here.)

The last conversation Matt had with his mother before he died was about the kids, and how they seemed to want school supplies, specifically pens and paper, more than anything, even food and water. He asked her to start up a collection and send him the supplies.  A career teacher, Mrs Freeman was all about it, and even though Matt was killed 2 days later, she decided to do it anyway. The Matthew Freeman Project: Pens and Paper for Peace, was, according to its website, "not created because Matthew is dead. Not because he died serving his country. It’s because of how he lived."

If you have a little cash or some time to spare, please help remember this true American hero and honor his final wish by making a donation to the Freeman Project - you can donate financially or help collect school supplies to send overseas. All the information is on the site.

RIP, Matt. You're sorely missed.

Sometimes the strangest things will help you let go

I started watching Army Wives right after I got out of the Navy, I think at the beginning of Season 2.  I wasn't sure about it at first, but the more I watched and realized that it was just about the ONLY military-oriented show on TV that actually did its homework and got the details right, the more I found myself getting into it. I've been kinda hooked, and gotten somewhat attached to the characters on the show.

SPOILER ALERT: If you're a fan of the show, and haven't watched last night's episode yet, stop now.

They've pretty much dealt with every possible situation that a miltiary spouse, family member, or friend could deal with in real life over the years on this show. They've had relationship troubles, kid troubles, transfers, battle injuries, dealing with the aftermath of losing a colleague in action. But up until now, while they'd had some legitimate scares, none of the main families had ever had to deal with a KIA. That is, until last night's episode, when the son of Catherine Bell's character was killed in Afghanistan.

I try to keep bad words off my blog, even though I don't do well with keeping them out of my speech, but last night, while I was watching this show, I LOST MY SHIT. I mean, the show was sad, and I can understand tearing up. Which is all I did at first - I mean, they had the official notification crew show up to tell Denise that her son had died during his fiancee's bridal shower. SERIOUSLY? If that doesnt make you cry then you have a cold, hard lump of coal where a heart should be.  But it wasn't until later in the show, I think the scene where Emmalyn spoke at his funeral, that I really lost it and started sobbing uncontrollably. 

At first I couldn't figure out why I was crying so hard at all of this. But then it clicked. A little over a year and a half ago, in August 2009, a friend and Naval Academy classmate and company mate, Capt Matt Freeman, USMC, was killed in action in Afghanistan. While we weren't super close, we had always gotten along well in school, and we had kept with each other's lives through the years through myspace and later facebook. When I got the news that he had been killed and that his funeral would be in his hometown near Savannah, I knew I had to go. Its only about a 4 hour drive from Atlanta, and I felt like there was no other option. Up until that point, my class had been very lucky. While we'd lost several classmates since graduation, none had been combat deaths. This was a new experience for all of us.

Nine members of 12th company class of 2002 made it to funeral. Most of those eight others had been much closer to Matt than I was.  Two in particular were the ones that had always tried to be "tough guys" at the Academy, as much as one can exist there. They did a pretty good job holding it together, but I saw them both cry the day of Matt's funeral. I don't really know how to explain it, but I think maybe I felt like I didn't have the right to just let it out if they weren't. No matter that women are much more likely than men to let it go in public. But I felt like I couldn't.  And while I cried a couple of times, I don't think I ever really cried for the loss of my friend.

I realized near the end of last nght's episode of Army Wives that I wasn't crying for the fictional Specialist Jeremy Sherwood, I was crying for Matt Freeman.  I was letting out the tears that I'd been afraid to let out that day in August 2009, that I felt I had no right to let out. I wasn't crying for the fictional fiancee, I was crying for the real Theresa Hess Freeman, who had married her husband just a few days before he left for Afghanistan.  I was crying for Matt's parents, for his friends, for his neighbors, and, finally, crying for myself.

So thank you, Army Wives. Thank you for giving me the chance to finally cry for my friend, and to finally let go of the grief I had kept welled up inside of me that day. And thank you for reminding those who watched the show that may not always remember that we ARE in two wars right now, for reminding them that our Soliders, Sailors, Airmen, and Marines are still over there, fighting for freedom, and paying the ultimate sacrifice.  I don't think I have to tell anyone here that war sucks.

On a final note, one of the things that struck Matt during his short time in Afghanistan was the fact that kids wanted pens and pencils and school supplies more than anything else, more even than food. They were starving for education.  He asked his mom, a teacher, to send some supplies, and two days later he was killed. His mom started the Freeman Project soon after, not because of his death, but because of his life.  More information can be found on the Project's website.